Let's preface this with the statement: I hate the modern age. Good? Good.
I've recently spoke about wanting to experience some of the things I always write about. I signed up on POF to meet a few people and see how it would go. Mostly, I wanted some first-hand experience on first dates and the “do” and “don't” of dating someone. Especially someone you met online. I thought it would be helpful to my career and give me unique input. I wasn't wrong, that's for sure.
Firstly, my POF experience has been Hell. Seriously, Hell. I got over 100 messages and none of them were particularly good ones. I did continue chatting with a few guys after I deleted my account. Of them, I only actually met 3. Let's talk about those 3...
The first guy, I invited to my house. We sat in the living room, great conversation, but no chemistry. I really wasn't feeling the guy. He said he was great at reading body language, but over-stayed his welcome. That was my bad because I could have easily told him to go and I didn't. I was trying to be polite. Anyway, he still tried to kiss me when he left. I told him I wasn't feeling it. When he left, I told him I didn't think we should see each other. Foreshadowing: I don't believe in ghosting. It's just a dick move. He agreed initially, but then texted a few other times asking to get together. I didn't reply the second time.
The second guy doesn't know I met him at all. We agreed to meet at a coffee shop near my place. I was there before him. I saw someone incredibly sketchy, but he didn't look like the guy I was meeting. Until the guy I was meeting texted and said he was there. I left as quickly as I could without making a scene and drawing attention to myself. He texted and asked where I was. I told him I was having a panic attack about leaving the house (not entirely false, but not entirely true – it was a panic attack about him, specifically). I said I didn't think it would be a good idea to meet. He waited in the neighborhood waiting for me to change my mind for 4 hours. He texted non-stop about where he was and what he was doing. I told him I thought he was pushy. He pulled a “nice guy” rant and then stopped talking to me. Good riddance.
The third... Well, here's a story for the ages. A cautionary tale about being careful what you wish for because you just might get it. In this story, we have a trickster genie and a gullible Princess. Metaphors aside: This guy was bold, overly confident. He sent a dick pic in the second message. But, there was something about him that I found oddly intriguing. So I kept chatting, despite that not being the only dick pic sent. Fast forward a week of occasionally chatting and we finally meet. He picks me up at my place and we go to a coffee shop. He buys. We go back to his place and watch a movie. The whole time, I'm on his living room floor because I don't want to give the impression that I'm easy. The movie finishes, he drives me home. He doesn't try to kiss me when I get out of the car. I reflect on this for two reasons: 1. He may not like me. 2. I'm glad he was respectful of my space. The next day, I invite him over and he comes... In more ways than one. We kept chatting for a few days and then, gone. I only found out when I was going through the people I was following on Instagram and realized he was no longer there. His account no longer existed. Oh, he blocked me. Okay. Rude. So I text him. Nothing. He sent me a good morning message yesterday... What could have possibly changed?!
So, I'm sad. Not only because I was actually attracted to this guy (which, let's face it is a miracle with how picky I am), but also because this is the first person I have been with in YEARS. To have the person I choose ghost me is, something else.
But, circling back, I got exactly what I wished for. I wanted to experience the modern dating world, and now I have. It's bullshit. No one has the balls to say what they are really thinking, even though I thought guy #3 did. I didn't have the balls to be honest with guy #2. Guy #1 didn't have the balls to be honest with himself.
It's not like it isn't a learning experience, because it is. I'll take it that way soon enough. I just felt like I needed to vent a bit and didn't really know where else to do it. I may take this post down in the future, since it's a bit more personal than I like to get on the site. But, in the mean time, enjoy laughing at the irony with me. I'll be laughing.
I've recently spoke about wanting to experience some of the things I always write about. I signed up on POF to meet a few people and see how it would go. Mostly, I wanted some first-hand experience on first dates and the “do” and “don't” of dating someone. Especially someone you met online. I thought it would be helpful to my career and give me unique input. I wasn't wrong, that's for sure.
Firstly, my POF experience has been Hell. Seriously, Hell. I got over 100 messages and none of them were particularly good ones. I did continue chatting with a few guys after I deleted my account. Of them, I only actually met 3. Let's talk about those 3...
The first guy, I invited to my house. We sat in the living room, great conversation, but no chemistry. I really wasn't feeling the guy. He said he was great at reading body language, but over-stayed his welcome. That was my bad because I could have easily told him to go and I didn't. I was trying to be polite. Anyway, he still tried to kiss me when he left. I told him I wasn't feeling it. When he left, I told him I didn't think we should see each other. Foreshadowing: I don't believe in ghosting. It's just a dick move. He agreed initially, but then texted a few other times asking to get together. I didn't reply the second time.
The second guy doesn't know I met him at all. We agreed to meet at a coffee shop near my place. I was there before him. I saw someone incredibly sketchy, but he didn't look like the guy I was meeting. Until the guy I was meeting texted and said he was there. I left as quickly as I could without making a scene and drawing attention to myself. He texted and asked where I was. I told him I was having a panic attack about leaving the house (not entirely false, but not entirely true – it was a panic attack about him, specifically). I said I didn't think it would be a good idea to meet. He waited in the neighborhood waiting for me to change my mind for 4 hours. He texted non-stop about where he was and what he was doing. I told him I thought he was pushy. He pulled a “nice guy” rant and then stopped talking to me. Good riddance.
The third... Well, here's a story for the ages. A cautionary tale about being careful what you wish for because you just might get it. In this story, we have a trickster genie and a gullible Princess. Metaphors aside: This guy was bold, overly confident. He sent a dick pic in the second message. But, there was something about him that I found oddly intriguing. So I kept chatting, despite that not being the only dick pic sent. Fast forward a week of occasionally chatting and we finally meet. He picks me up at my place and we go to a coffee shop. He buys. We go back to his place and watch a movie. The whole time, I'm on his living room floor because I don't want to give the impression that I'm easy. The movie finishes, he drives me home. He doesn't try to kiss me when I get out of the car. I reflect on this for two reasons: 1. He may not like me. 2. I'm glad he was respectful of my space. The next day, I invite him over and he comes... In more ways than one. We kept chatting for a few days and then, gone. I only found out when I was going through the people I was following on Instagram and realized he was no longer there. His account no longer existed. Oh, he blocked me. Okay. Rude. So I text him. Nothing. He sent me a good morning message yesterday... What could have possibly changed?!
So, I'm sad. Not only because I was actually attracted to this guy (which, let's face it is a miracle with how picky I am), but also because this is the first person I have been with in YEARS. To have the person I choose ghost me is, something else.
But, circling back, I got exactly what I wished for. I wanted to experience the modern dating world, and now I have. It's bullshit. No one has the balls to say what they are really thinking, even though I thought guy #3 did. I didn't have the balls to be honest with guy #2. Guy #1 didn't have the balls to be honest with himself.
It's not like it isn't a learning experience, because it is. I'll take it that way soon enough. I just felt like I needed to vent a bit and didn't really know where else to do it. I may take this post down in the future, since it's a bit more personal than I like to get on the site. But, in the mean time, enjoy laughing at the irony with me. I'll be laughing.
I Got Ghosted
Reviewed by Ali Larsen
on
March 03, 2020
Rating:
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