Never Signing Off

  Time, Estranged I realize I have a terrible relationship with time. I have trouble remembering things that have happened, and even more trouble remembering when. Time doesn't move the same way for me as it does for everyone else. My brain isn't linear enough. Every minute that passes in normal time is hours in my own time. I see everything happening in slow-motion. It feels like turning the page of a book is taking forever. Unless it's something big. Something tragic. Then, my brain fast-forwards through the sad parts and I come out on the other side of the disaster. I have to write everything down, or I won't remember it even happened. It's a coping mechanism, I think. It's something my brain started doing when I was younger. It wasn't because I had a terrible life or anything. It was hard, of course. I mean, it's not easy raising yourself. It's difficult to see the adults around you acting like helpless children. I moved around ...

I'm not a commentary person by any means. I don't normally pay any attention to celebrity gossip. I certainly give no attention to TikTok. But this came across my radar for more than one reason, in more than one circle, because it was awful.  I don't care what opinion other people have of Perez. I always thought he was a good guy. That's why I'm writing this.  I often paint the vultures in a negative light in my writing. Everyone can assume I'm including all of them. But while writing The Morgan Series, I intentionally highlighted that Mario wasn't a bad guy . Yes, the internet hated him for a while. But he's not a fucking devil by any means. He's just a messed up human being, like all of us are. For people to say that what happened is okay or for attention or however else they are trying to write it off is insane. It's not okay. Someone should have done more than report the video. Someone should have reached out to the authorities. Someone shoul...

  Stray Cats Charlie was thrilled with Frankie's announcement. I think he was only invited to come along by default. Frankie didn't know him, and didn't seem to care. But Charlie sees the tour as an opportunity for his book. He's going to get a bunch of his books printed and have them join us when they are ready. He's never been able to afford a cross-country book tour, so it's going to be different for him. Crystal agreed to help him run the merchandise stand that Frankie has agreed to give him. This is a big opportunity for promoting his brand at no extra cost. Charlie can sell his books and make new contacts. He can really get his name out there. Crystal always wanted to have her own tent on a festival circuit. It was her youth-inspired dream. She told me that she'd see those girls working at the tents and she thought it was the coolest job. It gave them the opportunity to meet all the bands, while interacting with the fans and getting to know wha...

  New Additions We were out at the bar when Crystal and Charlie got in from the airport. I open the front door, greeted by the smell of something divine. It's five in the morning, but Charlie is at the stove. “ Welcome home.” He greets, looking over his shoulder. I throw my coat towards the living room, walking further into the house. “ Don't make a mess.” Jared whines from behind me. I look over at him and shake my head. I look around when I get to the kitchen. Charlie has pots and pans everywhere and he's cooking. “ Are you making dinner?” I ask, groggily. He nods, looking over at me. I notice his eyes widen slightly when he looks past me. He's looking at the man closing the front door. “ Um.” He mutters, looking back to the stove. Crystal flies off the stool she was sitting on and towards the front door. Her arms wrap around Frankie's neck and she starts kissing all over his face. “ Why are you making dinner this early in the morning?” I ask Cha...

  Buzz After taking my shift at the bar that night, Jared started working as a bartender. He did his best to balance his personal performances with working for Reggie. It wasn't exactly hard work. Serving drinks can be easy once you know what you're doing. Not to mention, I was there to pick up his slack. Reggie might have minded paying two people to do one job, if he wasn't so preoccupied by the amount of money he had been making. He isn't the type to be obsessed with money. He opened this bar because it was his dream. But his dream was leaving a hole in his pocket. “ I owned this bar for five years before I hired you here.” He tells me, leaning against the bar. I'm watching Jared swerve around the crowd, swaying his hips to the music coming from the stage. “ I was barely breaking even. I only made extra money on the nights the bands came in.” He laughs, shaking his head. He's watching the band on the stage now. “ I noticed when you and Crystal ...

  Upcoming Surprises I've grown so accustom to quietly entering my own house. Most of it is to surprise the occupants. But I also like to scan the immediate area so I know what I'm walking into. I'm still not used to the sight I come home to most days. I don't think I ever will be. But I can't deny, I love it. To think, only a few short weeks ago this seemed like an impossibility. Now, it's happening right before my eyes. It's funny how life comes together in the most unexpected of ways. I walk across the floor towards the kitchen, only glancing over my shoulder at the two of them in the living room. They're both half-dressed, either for comfort or because they didn't bother getting dressed after. I don't judge either way. They've both worked hard to get here. I notice that the television is on and I can see they both have black controllers in their hands. They are playing some racing game, by the looks of the screen. A...

  Picture Perfect Madeline stayed for a while after her pancake dinner. We played a few rounds of poker over a bottle of scotch. She needed to nurse a hang over and I never need an excuse to drink. It's my night off, after all. I figured I would take advantage of it. It's been a few hours since she took off, heading back to her boyfriend. Jared has been telling me about his night, working for Reggie. He's got a beer in his hand, while I'm finishing off the bottle of scotch. “ He wants me to work on occasion.” Jared announces. I nod. “ It's been a while since you worked in the service industry, it's quite a change.” I warn. He nods, pulling at the label of his bottle. “ Yeah, but, I'm helping out a friend, right?” He counters. I nod again. “ This is true. He loves having you around too.” I agree. He laughs. “ He loves having anyone around.” He observes. I laugh. “ Yeah, he's a social butterfly.” I agree, briefly looking at the couch....