Never Signing Off

  Chapter 17 Backstage The crowd has already poured in from all sides of the venue. We're walking hand in hand as he's introducing me to everyone who is of any importance. The stage crew already know who I am, from the many times I've been to this venue on the arms of someone else. Or the die hards know that, at least. I can only imagine what is going through their minds. They must think I make a habit out of hooking up with rock stars, then simply toss them aside, like it never mattered. They couldn't know it's more like the opposite. Every rock star I've dated has done that to me. Tossed me aside like I didn't matter, moved on without actually telling me. Luke set the bar and so far, everyone has lived up to it. Or down, depending on your sense of direction. But no one is asking about Luke. No one is asking about Edward or Noelle. They are all asking about Hunter. It's a home show, after all. I could have seen any of these people out getting ...

  Chapter 16 Pre-show Nerves Crystal stretches her legs across the couch we're sitting on. The venue has a massive lounge, clearly intent on having big names and many stars. Since everyone else is busy getting ready for the show, it's just the two of us. For the most part. We're occasionally joined by a girlfriend of the band, since it is a home show. There are cousins and relatives everywhere. It's feeling more like a family reunion than a concert. At least, that's what Crystal said. I've never been to a family reunion, so I wouldn't know. Reunions require an initial union. I don't even know my second parents' name. I've told Crystal all about Hunter's invitation to the show tonight. She started asking a handful of questions, mostly relative to the history of me and Hunter. So I humored her for a while. I told her some stories about the good old days. Maybe they are all rose colored memories, considering what our present is....

  Chapter 15 The Other Man Let's rewind the story a little bit. I feel like I should detail their relationship. Two years ago, I was asked to accompany a band on tour. This was the band Luke had been fronting since before we even met. They had broken up, but they were getting back together. This was their reunion tour, but it was going to be a surprise. So, the band wanted to use roadies and stage hands that they were familiar with. They needed help that knew how to keep quiet, so rumors wouldn't spread and the announcement would stay under wraps. We boarded the tour bus, heading across the country. I was introduced to everyone else who would make the tour happen. One of the roadies, I happened to know already. I had met him back when he was a roadie for Hunter's band. After a few weeks, we started to bond over the tours we had been on. Within a few more weeks, we started sleeping together. I knew that Hunter had already been unfaithful. He was withdrawing...

  Chapter 14 Ticket The front door bursts open like it's the end of the world. Startled, I roll off the couch and onto the floor, making a "thud" sound as I land against the wooden panels. I look up to see him coming around the corner. But he doesn't seem hurried or panicked. He seems excited, like he's on top of the world. He could be a little more, subtle, instead of practically ripping the door off it's hinges. But, whatever. He's paying for the apartment. If he wants to destroy something, he can. “ Where is Crystal?” He asks, looking around the room. I look around as well, following his direction. “ I wouldn't know. I think I passed out.” I dismiss. He raises his eyebrow, knowing I never sleep during the day. I also don't sleep unless he's around these days, but he doesn't know that yet. I just don't want to acknowledge her departure. She asked me to keep it between the two of us for now. I think she has a date, but s...

I've made a playlist for the weird spoken poetry indie video stuff I've been recording. Subscribe if you want to. I can't tell you how to waste your time.

  Chapter 13 Girl Talk "He really loves you, you know." Her voice rings softly. I nod, absentmindedly with my hands wrapped tightly around my coffee cup. We're sitting on the living room floor of their apartment. Her legs are crossed and she's got her coffee cup sitting in the center. I've got my legs pulled to my chest, reflecting the defeat I feel inside. My cup is perched on my knees. “ I know he does.” I agree, for the sake of making conversation. My eyes look up from the floor, studying her attire this morning. She's wearing one of his t-shirts and it's practically hanging off her fragile shoulders. At least one of them, because it's bare. In place of the fabric is a tattoo Crystal has that stretches all the way down her back. It's one of many bigger pieces that she has. It's a string of assorted flowers from the back of her neck to her ankle, spiraling around different parts of her body to make an impact. For such a sweet and...