Chapter 4 (18+)

Hayden’s concern only got worse as the days went by and Rob wasn’t coming back to school. Finally, on Friday, he was waiting at the bus stop when she got there. She was excited to see him and threw her arms around him. He pulled away from her, like he was uncomfortable. She wasn’t sure how to react. He had never pulled away from her before. Now she was worried that she had done something wrong and she was the reason he wasn’t feeling well. She let out a sigh of frustration and stomped away from him. She waited on the other side of the bus stop. She sat down beside another kid, not giving Rob the chance to shun her again. She put her bag up on her lap and wrapped her arms around it. Rob walked past her without a second glance, taking a seat near the back of the bus. She could see him in the mirror at the front of the bus. He had his head rested on the window and he was just staring out the glass at the road below. In the quiet minutes before the teacher got into the classroom, Hayden decided to confront Rob.

“Tell me what’s going on.” She demanded quietly. Rob shook his head.

“I’m just stressed about Jessica.” He dismissed. Hayden nodded. She expected that.

“You’re always stressed about Jessica.” She sighed. He never pulled away from her before. She didn’t know how to address the issue. She dropped the subject and briefly filled him in on what he had missed. It wasn’t much. There had been some drama and a kid had been kicked out of the class. Other than that, it was only the first week of school. It was still introductory.

“I think my immune system is broken.” He complained, flashing a bright smile. Hayden nodded. It was nice to see him smile, even if she could tell it was fake. It didn’t help her to feel any better. She adjusted to face the front of the class as the teacher came in and immediately began his lecture. He was assigning the first book of the year. This would usually excite Hayden because she loved reading as much as she loved writing. Her mind was elsewhere.

The closer it got to their lunch hour, the more nervous Hayden found herself. Because Rob had been away for a few days, she had been sitting with Wayne. She wasn’t sure if he was going to join her if Rob was at her table. She didn’t know why she was even worried about such a silly interaction. She just felt like Rob wouldn’t appreciate him joining them. Although, he let Jessica join them all the time. Hayden was trying to get to know Wayne better before Saturday. He had never shown interest in her before. She hadn’t really gave him much thought. Now she was trying to get a feel for his personality. It would help her out if Rob would give her his opinion. Instead, he was choosing to practically ignore her at every chance he had. Hayden was getting really sick of his attitude. If he was going to be this moody at the party, maybe she would skip it altogether. She didn’t want to make it worse and she felt like being near him was making everything worse.

After school, Hayden went to Samantha’s. She had offered to pluck her eyebrows and show her how to do her make-up. Hayden wasn’t a girly girl. She was more of a tomboy. She never wore make-up. The idea was silly to her. She was comfortable with her appearance. Well, she wasn’t. But covering it up was entirely too much work and there were more important areas that needed her focus. It didn’t matter what she looked like. She wanted to be known for her brain not her looks. Still, it was nice of Samantha to offer. She had a complete eye shadow palette and several tints of gloss. It was all overwhelming to Hayden. She let Samantha choose a color palette because she knew nothing about what would work together. Samantha chose a brown palette with a highlight of orange and gold. The gloss was dark orange, barely tinting the lips. Samantha did her make-up to show her what to do. She tried to follow along on the second eye. It didn’t look as good as Samantha’s, but it was good enough for Hayden. She was confident she could look presentable for the party. Now, she needed to figure out what she was going to wear. She didn’t own a single dress. Samantha was laying a few dresses out on her bed for Hayden to choose from.

“I don’t know what matches!” Hayden screeched for the millionth time. Samantha shook her head.

“You’re going to have to put in more effort than this if you’re going to be dating.” She scolded.

“It’s just one date. I’m not dating anyone.” Hayden corrected. Samantha sighed.

“Whatever you’re going to call it, you need to fix this.” She waved her hand around Hayden’s torso. Hayden looked down at herself, then looked over at herself in the mirror.

“What’s wrong?” She mumbled. Samantha pinched the belly fat that was hanging over Hayden’s waistband. Hayden slapped her hand away.

“You’re getting chubby.” Samantha accused. Hayden’s eyes went wide.

“You did not.” She warned. Samantha shrugged.

“If you don’t want me to say it, you should lose a couple pounds.” She hinted. Hayden sighed.

“I’m trying.” She groaned. Samantha nodded.

“We should start playing tennis again.” She offered. Hayden nodded.

“That was always fun.” She agreed. Samantha motioned back to the bed.

“Now pick a damn dress!”

Saturday’s party arrived quicker than Hayden was prepared for. She had followed Samantha’s guide to do her make-up. It was subpar, exactly as Hayden expected it would be. She did her hair in a loose bun worn to the side. Samantha had picked a dark brown dress with specs of glitter in the fabric. Hayden chose to wear leggings underneath for comfort. She thought it looked alright. She was going to get her mother’s opinion before leaving, but she had already left for work. Hayden had to rely on the mirror and her own opinion. She grabbed her purse and headed out the front door. Wayne was waiting at a nearby bus stop, where Hayden had instructed him to wait. They started the short walk around the corner to Jessica’s cul de sac. There was a path that led right to her neighbors backyard. Hayden made sure to take careful steps since she was wearing a pair of shoes Samantha insisted she borrow. Hayden didn’t understand why she was supposed to make such a big deal out of an invitation to a party. She knew everyone already. It was just another social event to her. There was nothing particularly spectacular about it.

Hayden and Wayne walked into the party hand in hand. Hayden wasn’t sure if she was comfortable with it, but she went along with it. She figured holding hands was harmless. She knew it was proper etiquette to greet the host first, but she couldn’t see Jessica anywhere. She could be upstairs with Rob. It wouldn’t be the first time they took off during a party of hers. Hayden was a bit envious that Jessica had such an impact on Rob. She wanted him to want more for himself, but he seemed content to settle. The thought drove her crazy as they weaved through the party. Hayden’s ears were listening to any sound coming from above them. No one else could have heard anything over the music, but she had trained herself to hear a pin drop in a crowded room. It was a survival skill.

After half an hour of talking to random people, Wayne wandered off. Hayden assumed it was to partake in something she wasn’t into herself. She decided to take a minute to decompress. She headed upstairs to Jessica’s bedroom. The door was open, so she wasn’t inside. Hayden headed into the room and closed the door. She let out a deep breath as she sat down on Jessica’s bed. She quickly turned as she heard a noise from the bathroom beside her. Rob stumbled out, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Hayden faked a smile.

“I’m sorry. I just needed a minute.” She apologized. Rob nodded.

“Where’s your date?” He slurred. Hayden raised her eyebrow.

“He’s just a friend.” She argued. Rob shook his head.

“You’re blind if you don’t think he’s into you.” He argued. She pushed herself off the bed and walked towards him. He stumbled back, holding his hand out.

“Don’t.” He warned. Hayden slapped his hand away and stepped into his space. She was caught off guard by the overwhelming smell of whiskey on his breath. It got worse when he lunged forward and kissed her. His tongue in her mouth made her sick. She pushed him back and ran into the bathroom behind him. She barely made it to the toilet before she threw up. She heard Rob stumbling quickly out of the room. She waited a minute before standing up. She grabbed the bottle of mouthwash from inside the cabinet and took a big drink. She swished the minty sensation around in her mouth before spitting the remains in the sink. She gagged again as the smell assault her nasal passage again. She put her hands flat on the counter and looked into the mirror. Rob was drunk. She didn’t even know how to process that. He was the level-headed one. Hayden knew that meant things had been getting worse with Jessica. She didn’t understand why he was even here, trying to maintain an image that wasn’t close to the truth. Hayden felt so bad for Rob. She knew he wanted out. She assumed that was why he kissed her. He was fed up with Jessica and figured it was the only way to get rid of her. She would dump him in a second if she thought he even looked at another girl. That had to be the reason. Hayden kept repeating that to herself as she quietly left Jessica’s bathroom. She opened the bedroom door and was greeted by Wayne. He smiled widely at her. He gently pushed her backwards into the room, kicking the door behind him. Hayden put her hands out.

“What are you doing?” She asked with a shaky voice. Wayne took her hands in his and stepped forward. He kissed her softly, then gently pushed her mouth open. She whimpered involuntarily. Wayne let her hands drop and moved one hand between her legs. She jerked away.

“Relax.” He coaxed, placing his other hand on her lower back. He guided her backwards, letting her fall on the bed. He climbed on top of her. She could feel him grinding himself into her. She tried to protest, but her words were lost in his mouth. Any she managed to get out were inaudible compared to his moaning. His hand slid between her legs again as he rubbed himself against her hip. He started rubbing her through the leggings. She squirmed again, putting her hands on his chest. He grabbed both her wrists with one hand and held her arms above her head. His mouth moved its’ assault to her neck and he picked up speed. She couldn’t move. She couldn’t speak. She felt completely frozen in time. Wayne moaned into her ear, sending chills down her spine. She could feel tears forming in her eyes as her vision started to blur. She closed them tightly and waited for it to be over. Wayne startled as the door swung open behind them. He pushed himself off the bed and put his hands in the air.

“Sorry.” He apologized. Hayden heard Wayne’s footsteps leave, then the door close again. She didn’t want to open her eyes.

“Hey.” Rob’s voice called, alerting her to his presence. She opened one of her eyes and let out the breath she had been holding in her lungs. Rob quickly walked over to the bed as the tears started pouring from her eyes. Rob wrapped his arms around her.

“What did he do?” He asked softly. Hayden shook her head.

“I want to go home.” She answered. Rob nodded, holding his hand out. Hayden cautiously accepted it. She grabbed her purse, which had fallen to the floor. She straightened out her dress and followed Rob out of Jessica’s bedroom. Jessica was in the kitchen, drunk and making a scene. She always did that. Hayden knew Jessica couldn’t handle her alcohol. She drank this much intentionally. Likely to upset Rob for something she accused him of doing. Rob didn’t hesitate escorting Hayden out of the house. He briskly walked her down the street. He wasn’t leading her home. He was taking her to his home. She followed him inside and up to his bedroom. He locked the door once they were inside the room, even though no one was home. Brent was at the party and his parents were enjoying a night away from the boys. Rob motioned for Hayden to sit down. She sat down slowly, looking down at the ninja turtle bed sheets he still had. She smiled to herself, thinking of how old those sheets were. Rob started pacing around.

“I should go back and kick his ass.” Rob rambled, running his hands through his hair.

“Rob, I just want to forget about tonight.” Hayden begged.

“How am I supposed to forget after what he did to you?” He barked. Hayden shook her head.

“You don’t even know what happened.” She argued. Rob shook his head.

“I know you didn’t want it. I can see it on your face, in your eyes.” He insisted. She was quiet. There was no point arguing that part. She shrugged.

“I’ve been in this situation before.” She confessed. Rob dropped down beside her.

“Tommy?” He asked softly. She slowly shook her head.

“No. Since then. With a friend.” She clarified. Rob nodded slowly.

“Who?” He asked sternly. Hayden shook her head harder.

“I can’t tell you. She wouldn’t like that.” She defended. Rob’s eyebrow raised.

“She?” His voice cracked. Hayden nodded.

“Yes. She. And I didn’t really want to do it but she convinced me and I just went along with it.” Hayden explained. Rob was quiet, so Hayden continued.

“I think it was worse because I still have to see her all the time. I never had to see Tommy again. He overdosed and that was the end of the story.” Hayden rambled. Rob nodded along.

“Wow.” He sighed. Hayden shrugged.

“I just felt like I should tell you. I don’t know why.” She explained. They were both quiet. Hayden suddenly leaned forward and caught his lips with hers. He froze, but it was only momentary. He put his hand on the back of her head and deepened the kiss. She let out a soft whimper.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. That was completely inappropriate of me.” Hayden sighed. Rob pulled her lips back to his.

“Please let me have this moment.” He breathed out. Hayden bit the side of her lip, then nodded. He kissed her again, putting one of his hands on her lower back. A good chill ran up her spine and she completely melted into his hands. He slowly guided her down onto his bed, wrapping his arms around her. When she was laying on her back, he dropped to his side and threw one of his legs over her.

“Get off.” She groaned. He shook his head, nuzzling into her collar bone.

“I have to keep you safe.” He whispered. Hayden sighed. The night had not gone in any of the directions she had imagined. She had no idea how she ended up back at Rob’s and in bed with him. They were laying in silence for almost an hour when they heard Brent stampeding into the house. While he was in the bathroom, Hayden left out the front door with Rob following close behind. The walk to her house was also in complete silence. There were no words that could do justice. When they got to her house, Rob kissed her on the forehead. She watched him walking away for a minute before she headed inside. There was no one on the main floor, so everyone was already in bed. Hayden headed straight to the basement and stripped down out of Samantha’s clothing. She angrily threw the dress towards the corner. She recognized the article of clothing hadn’t done anything to her, but she couldn’t help herself. The whole reason she dressed so boyish was to prevent boys from looking at her. She didn’t like the way some of them would stare at her. She felt like meat to a starving man. She was sure most of it was in her head. She projected threats onto other people. She was also a victim. She knew if it happened before it could happen again. What if Rob hadn’t shown up just then?