ODAAT: Volume 2, Chapter 22

 

Family Matters

Frankie agreed to have an album concept by the time the tour was done. The songs and melodies will all be written. He wants to record the rough drafts on his laptop as well. Once home, we're going to New York. We're going to get into the studio right away and record our parts. Then, the label will have the album. They can hold onto it for a little while, creating a buzz. Then it will come out with a bang. There are three people in this band who understand the industry. We figure it'll be easy to make the most of the contracts. Jared knows a lot about working around album execs and unrealistic time lines. After all, he did have a career of his own. Even if I read his contracts at first, I wasn't always around. At some point, he learned for himself. He learned how to dance around the red tape. Since Frankie managed to screw over his old record label, I assume he's skilled as well.

When we got to Winnipeg, Frankie bought me a saxophone. He joked that he would find a way that I could play it on stage. Maybe, we'd use it in the background of the songs on the album. I didn't pay any attention to the words he spoke after he handed it to me. It felt surreal holding a saxophone. I wasn't sure I'd even remember the notes. I certainly didn't remember what any of them were called. But, it was like my fingers knew they were home. They knew every button to push. My tongue knew how to press into the reed. My lungs knew the amount of air that was needed to make the right sound. Everything felt perfect. He took my hand right after and said it was a gift. His way of saying thank you. They got me on stage two nights before. I wasn't thrilled about being in front of the audience, but I knew it would bring his vision to life. His touring band was dismissed the day after Charlie joined them. Frankie had just been playing guitar, while Jared and Crystal alternated between bass and drums.

Jared seemed to warm up to performing on stage, too. It's been years since he was in a band. So, he isn't used to working with other people. His last band was very opinionated, but they weren't passionate. It was a job to them. It was something that paid the bills and could make them famous. Hunter used to tell me they were all in it for the wrong reasons. So he dropped the band and attempted his retirement. But the music flowed through his veins like blood and he had to start playing again. He settled for acoustic sets, instead of trying to market himself as a solo artist. I don't think he ever had plans to tour again. He seemed uneasy as soon as I walked out on the stage though. I think I'm his problem with performing. He was lively for every show. He walked out onto that stage with purpose and confidence. He had none of the nerves he used to have when he performed. I guess it's because he was a real band now. But when I joined him the other night, it was like he lost a part of himself. I seemed to be the only one who noticed, so I haven't said anything.

If I can help it, I won't make it a point to go on stage. I'm not interested in being the center of attention.

Crystal has been working on her manuscript in every minute she has to spare. She thinks this band will be the perfect addition to her story. She's already traveled, she knows it all off by heart. But, she's never been in a band. She's only jammed with her brother back home. She said that yesterday. It was the first time I heard her talk about her family. No one asked her any follow-up questions, but it peaked my curiosity. She told me she didn't have a rough life, but I figured that was relative. I figured she was trying to see her past in a positive light to avoid facing the darkness of reality. But, if she had a brother she could jam with, maybe it was really an average childhood. After all, Frankie had a normal childhood and he still turned out this way. Maybe they both had real, loving families.

I don't understand why they would leave that behind. At the same time, I wouldn't. Since I didn't have a family of my own, I could never know what I was missing. Maybe, I wasn't missing anything in the end. Maybe not having a family was freedom. After all, so many people are determined to leave theirs behind. They have different visions of the future or they just want to experience the world. So they leave home, either against their parents' wishes or with their blessing. But, leaving none the less. I didn't really have to put up with that. Yes, my mother argued me. She didn't want me to leave, because she thought I was too young. But, I couldn't take her seriously. She gave me no reason to. Jared's father didn't care when he left. He didn't even bat an eyelash.

We left our families behind because they did nothing but bring us down. They left their families behind because they wanted to rise above. We all have our own reasons for the same decision. The idea of a band has made me think about the unity of the members. I've started to think of the bigger picture, about what it all means. I may not be a great musician, but it feels like we're a part of something much bigger than ourselves. This is a chance for Crystal to truly change the world. This is a chance for Charlie to create a buzz and watch his books fly off the shelf. This is Jared's chance to express his thoughts without a negative band turning them down. This is my chance to reinvent myself. We set out on this journey, hoping to build friendships. Somewhere along the line, we built something more. It started as a band, a musical connection. But, it's grown into something else entirely.

We've become a family. A family that truly matters.

Of course, there's no guarantee about tomorrow. There's no certainty. Each day is a gift, meant to be lived in the moment. Like Crystal always says: Don't worry about tomorrow because it ruins the surprise. You have to enjoy the ride. You have to find little moments that make it enjoyable. Life is a learning experience, but you have to be willing to learn.